Life

My friend D. passed away yesterday. It wasn’t unexpected, as a matter of fact she lived many months longer than the doctors thought she would. But even though expected, it was still a jolt. I have two relatives, unrelated, who both had stage 4 cancer and beat it. D. also had stage 4 cancer and I was so hopeful that she too would beat it, but she didn’t.

As I sit here and think about D’s. life I know that she lived life to the fullest. But none-the-less her life was cut short much too early. She and her husband skied and hiked all over the world. She was extremely active in her church. She taught Sunday school and was always one of the first to volunteer whenever help was needed. I could go on and on. I know that many, many people besides me – and of course – her family will greatly miss her.

I have another friend, B. who many years ago lost her father unexpectedly at a much too young an age. B. decided that rather than wait until she got older or retired, she would do what she knew she would enjoy while she was still relatively young. She began to think about the things she wanted to do now and how she wanted to spend the rest of her life.

Once B. made her decision she told me and her other friends that she felt that it was important for her to complete her search for where she wanted to live before she was near retirement. Her career had provided her the opportunity to live in many different areas of the country. But, she knew that retirement life would be different than her professional life. She decided that one of the first things she needed to investigate would be where she wanted to live based on the criteria she developed.

While she did her own research she did reach out to her friends for recommendations based on her list of wants and needs. She knew that she wanted to live near water in an area that had lots of opportunities for learning, entertainment, and socializing. She also wanted to live where people were actively engaged in the community. She also wanted to live where people knew their neighbors regardless of age differences or family differences or other differences.

She began her quest on weekends exploring different nearby communities in an effort to find a community that met most of the criteria for where she wanted to live. B. also researched other areas where she thought she might like to live. She took her vacations in some of these places. It took her two years but she decided that she knew where she wanted to live.

She then rented week-end and vacation times in different parts of the community to better get to know the area she had chosen to spend her retirement years. While this was a process that worked for her as a single working woman it might not work for someone with a family. It also might not work for someone on a more limited budget. But, in this day and age we are very lucky in that we can do much of our research using a computer.

Other people I know are very much tied to their jobs and their every day lives and don’t want to think about what might come next. I have talked to some of them about what they want to do now and later in life. I’ve also shared my thoughts about my life and what I want to do now and what I want to do next. I have to admit my future plans are not yet fully formed. But, I know it is time for me to think about where I am in life and where I want to go and do before my time runs out.

It’s Not Too Early

Now is the time that some people in their senior year of college are beginning to think about applying for jobs. These are the people who are likely to do better than their fellow students who haven’t yet thought about what comes next. While some college students have a resume that they have been maintaining and updating, others have not. If you are a college student and don’t have a resume I hope you will consider developing one, regardless of where you are in your college career.

Some college students have held jobs, paid or otherwise, and can talk to their accomplishments on those jobs. Others have not been employed. However, as a college student, you have many opportunities to demonstrate your capabilities and you can document them in your notes for your resume.

Think about the classes you have taken and the assignments that you have completed. Have you done research and presented your findings? Have you worked with others on a class project? Have you done other things while in school that you would like to do more of? And perhaps get paid for? Whether you have an idea of what you would like to do once you graduate or not, you have accomplished some things that showcase who you are and what you can do for a potential employer.

Getting started doesn’t have to be difficult. Begin by making notes on what you enjoy doing. You may want to include activities unrelated to school. You may want to do this over a period of time. But don’t take too long before you start.

As you begin your list remember it is not a resume so make it as long as you want. You may decide that something you listed earlier no longer interests you. That is fine, you can delete it from your list.

The next step after you list things that you enjoy doing is to list what you have accomplished that is related to those activities you have listed. For example, maybe you did a research paper on a topic that you found interesting. List that you wrote the paper and also list any positive comments the instructor made about what you wrote. Perhaps you participated in a team activity? Here is where you can document the specific things that you did that contributed to the successful outcome of the project.

As you begin to consider the types of roles you would like to do after graduation you can go online and look at job descriptions for those roles. Review what they want entry-level people to do. Are these things you want to do? Are these things you can do? Remember as an entry-level person it is likely you will learn a lot on the job. But you do need to have certain capabilities and these are listed in job descriptions. You can also find sample resumes of people who are in the roles you are thinking about.

Of course you want to speak to your professors and advisors and get their advice too. However the key point is that isn’t too early to begin thinking about a resume while you are in college. And of course, by beginning to document your accomplishments you will hopefully find it a relatively easy task to complete that job-winning resume.

Good luck and if you have any questions please comment.

 

Returning after a long absence

Many people find that they need, or want, to return to work after an extended absence. In some cases people have kept up with their fields, in other cases they have not. Those who have kept up with advances and changes in their fields may or may not have an advantage. Everyone returning to work after an absence will be facing challenges. With companies starting up and going out of business it may not be easy to find people you have worked with to give you references. Perhaps you didn’t plan to return to work but your circumstances have changed and you now need or want to find employment. Whatever the reason for your absence or whatever your plan to return is, there are ways to prepare.

If you have been out of work for whatever circumstance and not kept up with your field that doesn’t mean you can’t find a way to learn what has been happening and also find references. Today social media allows you to look for people you haven’t been in contact with for many years. You may want to search for people you worked for or with in the past. These people won’t be able to give you a current reference, but they will be able to speak to the type of worker you are. For example how you completed your deliverables on time, how you worked well in a team environment, how you helped others, or how you went the extra mile when you didn’t need to. There are many other aspects of how you perform job responsibilities that can be covered by prior employees and colleagues.

You can also ask for references from people you are currently interacting with. Working doesn’t always mean working for a salary in a business or other commercial environment. Do you currently work on projects related to your children? Have you volunteered to be a parent who chaperons field trips, helps with planning and running events, hosts learning or social events? Are you an active member of a PTA or other organization? Have you organized events such as a trip for a group of friends? Maybe you planned a wedding. Did you research information for yourself about vacations, local places to visit for fun or learning? Any of these types of activities can require the same skills and knowledge that might be needed for a new job role. Think of all the skills and expertise needed to complete these activities that could translate to work situations.

Hopefully, you can add some more types of work you have done that can be the same or similar to what would be needed for a job role you are interested in obtaining. Basically, I believe the first thing you need to do when thinking about how to present yourself after being out of work for a while is to answer a few questions so that you can plan how to best to proceed.

You may want to consider this your current job. Yes, your job is now to work on identifying what you need to do to get a new job. I recommend you begin by looking at postings for jobs that you might like to perform. Note the skill requirements and accomplishments required. Once you have that list, think about what you have done that would show accomplishments that relate to the job requirements. Next think about people who can give you references to show how you have performed these activities.

Perhaps you can’t find references for one reason or another. You may want to volunteer for an organization that requires the skills you have or even the skills you want to learn. You can then request references from these organizations.

There is more to think about and do as you begin the journey toward employment. But, I will stop here, as this should give you a place to start. Questions? Let me know and I will attempt to answer them. Good Luck!

Painful Learning

Two of my friends working for different companies recently found themselves unemployed. After some discussion, they decided they needed to take some action to move forward with their lives. At different times in the past I’ve helped both of them update their resumes. They contacted me and asked if I’d like to join them for an extended weekend away to help them update their resumes. I usually help people update or develop their resumes through back and forth email messages. However, since my friends wanted to develop and update to their resumes in real time I was willing to work with them over the extended weekend.

My normal process is to start by sending an individual a series of questions and ask them to think about the questions and send me their responses electronically. I tell them not to stress and it won’t be a problem if they don’t answer some of the questions on the first pass. When I receive a response I ask additional questions, drilling down for more information. We go back and forth electronically until I think I have enough information to take a pass at developing a first draft for them. This has worked well for many people over the years. Of course there are some people who decided my process wasn’t for them and they opted out. Which, since I rarely charge for the service was just fine with me.

My friends and I met at a bungalow on Cape Cod. We had a relaxing first day, which included a very nice dinner at an ocean front eatery. The next day after breakfast we took a brisk walk and returned to the bungalow ready to begin working.

I had developed a modified process to account for the fact that we would be working together in real time. I began by asking my first question. One of the women challenged me to explain the full process to her before she answered my question. I was surprised as I had worked with her before, but I explained the process and asked if they were ready to begin. The second women said she didn’t think she wanted to participate. Again, I was surprised but said fine, no problem. The first woman said that it wasn’t at all what she expected. She said she wanted to work on figuring out what she wanted to do next. She said what she needed from me was career and life coaching.

I was taken aback as this isn’t what I had offered and I wasn’t sure I could help her with what she needed. But, and here is where I made my mistake, I said I would try to help. I asked a question to try and get a sense of what direction she wanted to go in. But, she was expecting me to guide her in figuring out what she should explore next. I tired a few more questions and realized I was getting nowhere. They were now both disappointed with the process and disappointed with me.

I felt awful but didn’t think it would benefit any of us for me to say that I didn’t have expertise in career coaching. I realized too late that in my desire to help them, I had only frustrated all of us. At this point we agreed we weren’t getting anywhere and agreed to go out for another walk. We walked and talked about other things. The weekend then moved forward as any of the others we had spent together without having an agenda. I suspect that we all came away from the experience a bit unhappy. I believe that I learned that I have to make sure before I commit to do something that I really understand what I’m being asked to do. I also need to make sure it is something that I know how to do and is something that I want to do.

I have always said that if I learn something from an experience then it was worthwhile. But, while I certainly learned from this experience, it was a painful learning. Going forward I will make sure that if things appear to be going south I will stop immediately, recalibrate and then determine whether I need to end the event or move forward with it.

Why do some learning experiences need to be so painful?

What Can I Do?

Like so many of us, I am grappling with the shocking and horrifying recent events. When things like this happen, I ask myself, what can I do? The answer, at least in the short term, is to keep doing what I can do to make my life and the lives of people around me just a little bit better. Sometimes, all you can do is what you do. One of the things I do is to help people develop, update, revise, or change their resumes. In the last few weeks, I have been hearing from a number of people looking for my assistance as they grapple with the loss of their jobs. While not on the national scale, this is something I am qualified to help with. So I do what I can where I can. This blog is my way of trying to contribute useful information to those who need this type of assistance.

The people that I know who are receiving notice have been in their roles for many years and have been successful at what they do. But, the companies they work for are changing their focus and no longer need people in those roles. Several people have told me that they had been thinking that they would be with these companies until retirement. Some will now retire a bit early, but many others can’t. They were not prepared for this. Yet, life threw them a curve ball and they need to find the path to their futures. What I can do is talk to what I know and, hopefully, I can help people who need to find new jobs.

Even if you don’t think you are ready to move forward, it is important to begin the process, even if it is only in a small way. Start by opening a new document and creating a list of all the things you like to do and are good at doing. The items on this list can be anything at all. Maybe you want to list some work-related items and also things that you do in your personal life. Just write. Don’t try to categorize or edit. Just get things from your mind to your document. Don’t spend a lot of time on it. But, save the file and think about things you might want to add to your list. Continue to get back to this list frequently until you think you have listed everything. Now divide your list into two parts, job related activities and non-job related activities.

Next list all the jobs you have had in the last 10 years in reverse chronological order. Start with your most recent role and work backwards. If you have any activities on your list that you did more than 10 years ago add them to the end of your list. Carefully review your list. Are there any items on the list that you no longer want to do? If yes, delete them. This is you planning your next step. For right now, make it a plan that will make you happy. Next list all your non-job activities in reverse chronological order.

Now for each role and each activity, list your accomplishments. List the things that you did, not your responsibilities, but rather what you did and the end results of what you did. Explain your specific contribution.

For the items that you have listed that were not part of a job role, briefly explain how these activities would contribute to a place of employment. Adding these items to your cover letter when applying for a position where performing these activities along with all the activities you have listed in your resume will allow you to showcase all that you can do and want to do.

Hopefully these steps will help you start to develop a resume and cover letter that will help you get your next role.

These are just the first few steps towards building a winning resume. We all have a lot of work ahead of us, but small steps can help when you feel paralyzed. Try to do something productive every day. Before you know it, you will have done quite a lot. For my part, I’m going to keep writing this blog and hoping I can help make my little corner of the world a slightly better place.

Good Luck and see you all next week!

To Sleep or Not to Sleep

I am now reading “Why We Sleep” by Matthew Walker, PhD. I’m finding this book a fascinating read and wanted to make others aware of it. If you are not already aware of it, I suggest that you might want to check it out or at least look at some of the reviews. I’m not suggesting he’s right and I’m not suggesting he is wrong, but it is definitely an interesting read and I thought I’d recommend it to everyone.

There are many reviews on-line, and all that I have read praise this work. I haven’t yet found a scholarly review. However, he does a very good job of providing references throughout the book.

In reading this book, I keep wondering how my life might have been different if I had known some of this when I was younger, maybe even when I was a teenager. I have no way of knowing if the teenage me would have given this book any credence, perhaps not. I just don’t know.

Here is a quote from one review by Russ Allbery:

http://collab.debian.net/portal/planet-debian/russ-allbery-review-why-we-sleep

“Walker opens the book with a discussion of the mechanisms of sleep: how we biologically fall asleep and why, how this has changed over time, and how it changes with age. Along with that, he defines sleep: the REM and NREM sleep cycle that you may have already heard of, how it manifests itself in most people, and where dreams fit in. The second part then discusses what happens when you sleep, with a focus on what goes wrong when you don’t. (Spoiler: A lot. Study after study, all cited and footnoted, has found connections between sleep and just about every aspect of mental and physical health.) The third part does the same for dreams, fitting them into the picture along with a scientific discussion of just what’s going on during dreams. The fourth and final part tackles the problem: why don’t we get enough sleep, and what can we do about it?”

Given that I can’t go back and change my sleep habits I’m left wondering how much damage I have already done to my health. I’m also left wondering how much benefit I and others can obtain from beginning to follow the recommendations made in the book at whatever stage in life we are now in. Perhaps a follow-on volume will answer these and some other questions.

I’m also wondering how much damage I may have done to myself during my college and gradate school days when I, like many others, burned the candle at both ends. Like many students, I needed to work to pay my tuition and my bills. I also needed to spend time at the library. Yes, I went to school before anything I might have needed was available on line. I also felt, and still do feel, I needed down time, and that was generally only available to me late at night. In general, I rarely got to bed before midnight. In those days I was proud of the fact that I could function on five or less hours of sleep. I almost always fell asleep immediately. Which in reading this book, I now know is a sign of the fact that I wasn’t getting enough sleep. I got good grades and was happy with my life. But, now I wonder did I sacrifice some later years by living and sleeping the way I did. In the back of my mind, I wonder if living like I did was better than having more years later in which my life may not offer as much as my younger years did. But, since I can’t redo my past, I need to decide how much – if not all – of the advice being offered by this book do I want to adopt.

I also wonder if I try to change my habits now is it too late to do me any good. What if I follow some but not all of his advice? Will it help my health? I also am cautious about recommending this book to the high school and college students in my life. I know that when I was that age I wasn’t very good at accepting advice from older people.

Today I don’t fall asleep the moment my head hits the pillow like I did in earlier life. I also sometimes have trouble sleeping through the night. So I have started to work toward going to bed and waking up at the same time each day and trying to get eight hours of sleep. I’ve been on this regimen for a whole three days so I suspect it might be too soon to make any decisions. But, I have to admit I’m feeling better the next day. Of course this could be a placebo effect, but….

I have to say that I am happy to have read this book and I hope that whatever I do or don’t do as a result will help me to have a better life.

Again, I hope that my sharing information about this book will be of value to you.

Happy New Year to all!

Mother Nature

Back in July, I posted a blog about the effects of the weather on my house. It was posted on July 18th in case anyone wants to read it, or perhaps read it again. “What I did on my summer vacation.” I described how the power line to my house was taken down by heavy winds the day after a very heavy storm in my area.

This past week we had another heavy storm and I considered myself lucky as neither my house nor my office suffered any ill effects. That doesn’t count my cell phone loudly going off at 2:00 AM to tell me and everyone else in the area that the roads were flooding and that they should travel with caution.

The next day the weather reports were predicating temperatures in the 30s for that night. While it was still rather warm and sunny I thought my house was anticipating the cold weather as it began to get quite cold. My thermostats are battery operated and I usually change them when we spring forward or fall back. I thought my thermostats were getting just a little bit ahead of the program so I went ahead and changed the batteries. When that didn’t work, I reluctantly decided I would need to get a professional in to check things out. But, since it was Friday evening when I made this decision, I thought it would be best if I waited to call until Monday morning.

I went to sleep on Saturday night knowing that heavy rain was predicted for our area. This was the night when the phone went off at 2:00 AM. I called the heating company on Monday morning and – unsurprisingly, perhaps – had a bit of a hard time convincing the person on the other end that my problem was not related to the storm. The heating company was affected by the storm and didn’t have connectivity and the employees were having a bit of an emergency themselves. I assured them that I could wait until they took care of people who were impacted by the storm and of course that included them.

The HVAC person came on Tuesday and said that he’d never seen a situation like the one I had. Everything in my system had been ‘fried.’ It was about that time that I remembered the summer incident. I told the HVAC tech about how the power line had gone down it and he said that knowing that, what he was seeing all made sense. Many dollars later my house is warm and I’m hoping Mother Nature will treat me more kindly going forward.

My town is still trying to recover from the effects of the storm. Many trees went down and a lot of damage was done. A friend and I walked our rail trail this morning and we had to maneuver around a very large fallen tree on our way out. On our way back we were passed by a DPW vehicle and when we got back to the spot where we had seen the fallen tree it was gone. But no matter how fast the town moves, there is still a lot to be done.

I was lucky and never really lost power, just suffered through a few comparatively small hiccups. Many houses and cars were damaged by trees. Many people were posting on our town website that they still didn’t have power on Wednesday and I saw several DPW trucks working in the area on Wednesday night. No matter how many precautions we take and no matter how in control of our lives we try to be, Mother Nature can still remind us that so very many things are beyond our control.

I won’t say that you should always stay calm and not get angry or frustrated. I certainly wasn’t very calm when I realized that my entire house was without heat as we head into the cold weather! But if we take things as they come and deal with them as best we are able, things will generally work out better than if we panic and go in too many directions at once. Life works better when you have a plan. And it’s best to have a few backup plans in place as well. My thanks and respect to all the hard-working people who helped me and so many others when they were going through their own crises at the same time. That’s professionalism at it’s best!

I’m looking forward to calmer days (and nights) going forward for all of us. Stay warm and dry (and keep your resumes up to date.)

Major Choices – College and Career Decisions

Are you at the point in your education where you need to decide on a major but have so many interests that you can’t nail it down? Perhaps you don’t know enough about different careers to make a decision? Are you concerned that you will make a wrong decision?

https://www.scholarships.com/resources/college-prep/choosing-a-major/10-things-to-consider-before-choosing-your-major/
10 Things to Consider Before Choosing Your Major
What is Your Passion?

“Talk to People who Have Obtained the Major You are Considering
If you already have a major in mind that you think is a good fit for you, you might want to consider chatting with someone who obtained a degree in that field. They can probably answer your more specific questions better than a guidance counselor as they have had first hand experience. Additionally, they can provide information about the curriculum, the workload, and tell you about their experience looking for work after graduation. You might find that different degrees have impacted the graduates very differently when they pursued opportunities after graduation. For some, the degree they chose made finding a position easy, for others their degree was their greatest obstacle.”

Making a decision to pursue a career direction is important but it isn’t a life binding decision. Many people find that they want to change directions or find that they didn’t know enough about the career direction they choose. I know of several people who found that, although they thought they wanted to be an attorney or a teacher, found when they actually began to do the work that it wasn’t a good fit. Many of them decided that they needed to branch out into another direction and they did. Without thinking much about it, I can identify three different people in my life who now are in very successful careers but started out with degrees in very different fields.

Also know that you are not alone. There are many college students grappling with the same questions about choosing a major.

https://www.wayup.com/guide/community/7-steps-to-choosing-the-perfect-college-major/
7 Steps to Choosing the Perfect College Major
Kema Christian-Taylor – WayUp Staff

“Choosing your major isn’t a life or death decision. It’s simply a choice that yes, will affect your college experience, but won’t restrict your career choices moving forward.”…
“Think about your favorite courses, your favorite professors, or your favorite projects.”…
“Choosing your major can feel like you’re deciding your fate for the next 3 or 4 years–even the rest of your life, but the important thing to remember is that your major does not define your career path.”

I recommend that you not only think about academic subjects but also think about the things you enjoy in life outside of school. Are there things you enjoy that might also be an area that you could study? Perhaps an area of study is connected to what you enjoy. For example, if you enjoy reading, you might consider whether writing, reviewing, editing, or some other aspect of publishing would be a potential career for you. Or maybe you like playing computer games. If so, there are many IT roles that you might want to explore.

Maybe you like many different activities. In any case there are lots of books in the library, which can give you information about different roles. My recommendation is that you find people who are actually in the different fields you are interested in and ask them if they would be willing to speak with you about what they do. I have found that most people really like to speak about what they do.

In terms of choosing a major and then finding out it isn’t the field that you want to work in, that is fine. What you learned will not go to waste. You may be able to apply it to the career that you want to explore next. I know someone who completed a degree in computer science. She then went into the Peace Corps, a plan she had before completing her degree. When she returned from the foreign country where she completed her year in the Corps she decided to go to medical school. While she didn’t start out thinking about medicine, it ended up being the right decision for her.

Someone else that I know was passionate about getting a degree in culinary science. But, after working in the field for two years, he found that while he loved to cook at home, the work that is done in a restaurant wasn’t what he had hoped it would be. He too went back to school and today he is a successful IT person.

Another example is a young lady that graduated with a degree in fashion. But, after a year she realized she wasn’t feeling fulfilled. She also realized she didn’t know what she wanted to do. She is now at City Year.

https://www.cityyear.org/what-we-do/problem
“At City Year, we partner with most at-risk schools to help bridge the gap between what their students need and what the schools are designed to provide. In doing so, we’re helping students reach their full potential and graduate high school in communities all across America.”

Another way to learn about different careers is to volunteer. Maybe for just a few hours a week while still in college or even after you graduate.

https://bigfuture.collegeboard.org/explore-careers/careers/the-scoop-how-i-got-started-on-my-career-path
The Scoop: How I Got Started on My Career Path
A Q&A with Professionals

“After I graduated, my mom suggested that I volunteer on a political campaign. … Volunteering was really an opportunity to network and meet people in all kinds of businesses. I still didn’t know what type of business I wanted to work in, but I ended up getting interviews at several companies through the people I met. Eventually, I made it to someone who was in real estate development.
—Adam Golden, real estate developer”

Basically there are many ways to find a career that will make you happy. Whether it is before college, during college, or after graduation. The key from my point of view is to explore options by talking to people, research, or volunteering. You may be able to find other ways to learn about options you might like. If you have any good suggestions, please leave them in a comment below!